a very calm Friday night.

Well, I made it through another week. I have been busy this week, but it seems that I have done earth shattering. Right now I am just enjoying the sound of nothing. Rusty is sitting next to me reading a book, and Ryan is watching t.v. Everyone else is gone for the night.

Tomorrow is the first weekend of fund raising. I am bracing myself for another long year of raising money for Nikki's mission trip. This year she is going to the Philippines. I can't wait for Nikki to go. I know that may sound strange, but I love the fact that my daughter has these opportunities. I am also glad that Rusty and I have learned to just roll with the punches.

Amber got an upsetting phone call today. One of her friends is in the hospital, and it looks like she may be delivering her baby almost 7 weeks early. Amber is trying to figure out what she can do, I told Amber to keep her bum at home. I swear Amber is going to hack up a lung, so she does not need to be around them. I did tell Amber that I would be willing to take over some dinners or do what ever. All she has to do is let me know what she needs.

I had a flash to when Amber was born. Amber was born early by a crash c section. I almost lost her. Man I so know this gals pain. I don't think Amber knows how scared I was. I was 19, alone, and I had no help. I was as scared as any person could get, but I somehow made it.

Ryan's IEP went well I guess. We have another one coming up in a few months. That is the one that really scares, because we will have to send Ryan to high school. The school system also says that he is not as retarded as then originally thought even if his score are very low. I just gave them the dear in the head lights look. I swear I should be allowed to smack those people.

On a good note Ryan principal walked up and handed me a piece of paper and told me to sign it. Now Ryans principal and I go way back, so I had to wonder what she was up to. I signed the paper and handed it back to her. The principal starting smiling and she got so excited. I finally asked what I just signed. She said "Special Olympics are coming to our area and you just signed Ryan up track and field!" I am so happy. Ryan was so thrilled, and he said that he is going to have to run the dogs more. I am just so happy that he finally found something that he likes doing.

I have been feeling bad the last few day's, so I have been spending my afternoons in la la land. I know that this will pass and soon I will be back to myself. I do not regret choosing not to have surgery. I do not regret the choice to heal my body with food and herbs. If I can keep all my body parts, and only be sick every once in a while, then I am going to do it.

I wrote a blog entry for reduce footprints, so if you want to go check it out, she is listed on my side bar. I announce in there that I have finally come up with a new challenge for myself. I heard a saying that said " If your grandmother would not recognize it, then you should not eat it." So this year I am giving up boxed cookies and cakes. I am going to get back to the basics and do more baking from scratch. The only scary thing is, I have never made a red velvet cake from scratch, so we will have to see how that turns out.

I learned a lot from my no spending diet, and it has changed me forever, so I will have to see how this whole baking from scratch thing goes. I know I will have to be more prepared and I will have to really make sure that we have staples at all times.

We the Chinese food I ate is not settling well, so I am going to go to bed. No sex tonight, but maybe my dog will let Rusty snuggle with me. Yes, my pit sleeps between us and is I am not feeling good he will not let anyone near me. Its like he knows something is wrong with me.