almost done

I am almost done with a lot of things. One of the things that is almost done is summer. I have to say that this breaks my heart. So I am going to try to get as many beach days in as I can. I hear from other people that it is cold where there are. Our temps are still hotter then all get out, so I guess I could have more beach days but with the children all in school it is getting a little harder.

I am almost done with a total decluttering of my home. I started following the flylady again and she has really helped me get my bum into gear. Last week I finally cleaned out our walk in closet that we could not walk into. Today I cleaned out our living room. I have no idea how we got some many dvd's. We are not even t.v. people! So I boxed them up and some of our old board game. They are now in a new home. It feels so good to be almost done decluttering.

I am always on the look out for cheap things to do with the children. I found out that there is going to be a tall ship festival. so I showed Rusty the web page and he said "yes, we should take the children." I think it will be cool. I have never been on a tall three mast, wooden ship. Then we got to looking even more and it turns out that we can go have dinner on the ship and they be a part of a canon battle, all while floating in the ocean at sunset. Rusty said that he really wanted to do this with the children. O.K. I can do simple math, $30 x 6. So I asked all the children if the wanted to go. If they did not want to go then I was not going to waste the money.

Chris said that he would pay for his ticket. I did not like that idea, and Rusty said to let him do it. We end having a very loud discussion about weather or not he should pay for his own ticket. Rusty's point was that he now has a job and he wants to contribute and pay some of his own way. My point is that I told him I would treat him like one of our own children. After thinking about for a few day's I realized that this was not a battle worth winning. I called Rusty and Chris outside. I told Chris that if he wanted to buy his own ticket that was fine as long as he understood that we would buy for him.

Well, I need to go knock down some webs that are hanging around, and then they rest of the day is mine! I am going to do some sewing and I do have a few phone calls to make.

Life is so good.

you should have been there

People that around me a lot know two very important things about me. One is I am allergic to bee stings and the second is allergic to penicillin.

Now on with the entry. The beach was amazing yesterday! We had some really big waves and I just there watching the surfers and the waves. I guess there are a few storms out to see so that is why the waves were massive. I don't really care why the waves were massive, they just were just so awesome to look at.

So I was sitting on the shore, just letting the waves hit me and the sun bake my body. Then this really big wave came and started dragging me up onto the beach. I turned to yell at me girlfriend, but she could not hear me because she was listening to her ipod. I no sooner screamed her name that the wave took over our little piece of beach.

It was something out of a cartoon. The wave came in soaked us and everything we owned, and then disappeared into the ocean. I just laughed. What else could I do. I had to admit that everyone around us thought it was funny as well.

So we picked up all of our soaked stuff. My camera and cell phone, and my girlfriends ipod are now soaked with salt water. My girlfriend tries to rinse out some of our stuff, and I start taking apart all the electronics.

After we moved everything up to the pick nick table we decided that we both deserved a candy bar. My girl friend plops down in a beach chair and I pull up a dry piece of beach.

All of a sudden something is poking me and it hurts. I look under my arm and scream "mother fucker!" I had just gotten stung by the biggest bee I had ever seen. Quick load everything into the truck, I have to get some benadryl. We get the exchange and I get some benadryl .

By this point I can feel my air pipe getting tighter and tighter. So we sit at the exchange for a little bit to see if the benadryl kicks in. If not we had to high tail it to an aid station.

We were at the very north end of base and the navel hospital is a good thirty minutes away. So I figured I would just walk into an aid station and I knew the epi pen me even if I am not a marine.

Well the beidryl kicked in. My wind pipe was still tight, but it was not getting any tighter. Yes, I now have an epi pen, and yes I will start carrying it with me at all times.

We are going back to the beach next week and I can't wait!

I still have not tried to put my phone and camera back together yet. If they are dead then they are dead. No sence in worrying about something I can't change. I found a similar camera on ebay, so I can buy a new one next month. Nikki has a old cell phone that I can use.

Rusty actually said that he would like to buy me a black berry? What my hubby said that. Its all good.

Today I finished cleaning out my closet. Man we had a lot of crap in there! I think the more room you have, the more crap you store. Since the people across the street have a salvation army people coming today, I just added to their pile.

The people across the street put out some nice sofa's. So what do my ghetto children do? They wait for night fall and they go get their sofas and put ours out for the salvation army. I am so proud of them. I have taught them well.

Life is sooooo good

no grocery getter and the beach

Well, it has been a rather eventful few days. As usual I take it all in stride, while Rusty stresses over some of it.

The fuel pump went out on my car. I don't really care. I have lived without a car before and I can live without one again.

However, the car died at the grocery store. So Chris calls Rusty. Rusty had been gone for a while, so I called him. He said that he was looking for a tow rope. I just asked him why since we have AAA and they will tow us for free. Rusty hung up on me. Now he is looking around for the cheapest fuel pump, I am just thinking whatever.

I know it is a guy thing, but I just don't care. Sell the car, push it off a mountain, I can still hang, besides it would save us money. Rusty will get the darn fuel pump come hell or high water, and I will still only put 10 miles a week on the car.

I called and left a message for the principal of Ryan's school. The next day Ryans teacher called me. She is so young and perky and she called me before I had my second cup of coffee! In my nicest yet harsh voice I said "I left a message for the principal, not you. I do not wish to speak to you, I want to speak with the principal." I hung up on her.

Yesterday the principal called me. Now she and I go way back, and at one point our husbands even served together. So I listened to what she had to say then I just laid it on the line. I simply said "You assured me that they teacher could speak read and write in English, so she should not have any trouble understanding the terms of the IEP. No I don't care if Ryan is the only child in the class with a calculator. Maybe the other parents should request one. No he is not suppose to use it "check" his work. He is suppose to use it to do his work. I am working my way up the chain of command. My next stop will be district." She assured me that Ryan will have his calculator and that there will be no need for me to go to district. So we will see.

I had to deal with Ryan's b.o. problem. For whatever reason he refuses to wear deodorant. So I told him that the first I smelled him I was taking away everything and that he would get sit in his room and stare at the walls all night. Well, he is now putting on his deodorant, but is wearing dirty clothes. So last night I asked him if he is suppose to wear dirty clothes and he said no. So for the rest of the week I am going to pick out his clothes. Ryan is not happy, but he will learn.

Today is going to be a great day. I am meeting my girlfriend and we are heading to the ocean. This is a big girl trip, and I can't wait to spend some time with her. Last week my girlfriend found out that she was laid off, so she is now looking for a new job. I am sure that she needs to blow off some steam and just relax, so the beach will be perfect.

I have two baby kittens sleeping right above the keyboard. I can't believe how big they are! I think I am going to take them back to the shelter next week.

Amber is in a math class with a gal that use to live down the street. She is a good person and her parents are "rough" on her. They will not help her at all. So this gal and her family moved last summer and now they live close to the college. So last night Amber mentioned that she is now picking this gal up and giving her a ride to school. That's my girl. Show compassion. Amber also loaned this gal her text book since she can't afford to buy one. I told Amber that I will buy her a math book. We found this place on line called abebooks.com and they sell college text books for $5 plus shipping. I can afford to buy this gal a book.

I also mentioned to Amber that this is the type of gal I am proud to know. She will do whatever it takes to go to college, even if she has to walk 2 miles each way, and borrow books. Good for her!

I am back to following the flylady. My home is not cluttered, but it sure could use a deep cleaning. This week we are in the master bedroom. So I took 15 minutes and ventured into the abyss that is our closet. For just 15 minutes I went through some stuff. Before I opened the door I knew right away what I wanted to get rid of. So I grabbed that stuff, and the headed for my crate of winter tops. I got rid of about half of that. Then I looked at Rustys side of the closet and I grabbed a lot of shirts that I swear were standing by them self.

Nikki is my pack rat and my messy child. So I handed her two grocery sacks. I said "fill one up with trash and the other with clothes. She was done in just a few minutes. I guess I can make small dents. Then Amber grabbed a sack and cleaned out her sweaters.

Everyday I am posting more the stuff up on freecycle. I am just glad that someone is getting some use out of the stuff. Now I have to tackle the boxes that Rusty has not unpacked yet. That should be fun.

I sent my shrink an e mail laying out all of my concern about my mom and GCC coming for Christmas. Yes, I agree with everyone, this is a tragedy in the making. My concerns go a lot further then just food. Rusty listened while I laid them all eat. Rusty did say that we need to lay down the law as far as eating goes. So I am going to take what my shrink said and think on it some more, and then I will make my decision. I have to do what is best for my family, and I will not do that uninformed.

Time to go pack for the beach.

down, but so not out

The last few days I felt really bad and was in the bed. I can't live like this. So I would get up and do what I could, and then I would rest when I needed to. Today I feel great and I can't wait to take on the world.

I have gotten so much done today, and I still have more that I want to get done. I contribute all of my energy to going back on my diet. I just got lazy and I stopped taking all my supplements and I was eating fast food. I have so learned my lesson. If I treat my body like crap then I will feel like crap and I will end up in bed.

I am still working on getting Rusty to cut down on his meat in take. Yesterday I made a huge pot of potato soup. I usually add ham to it, and I did so yesterday, but I just added a lot less and I added more vegi instead. Rusty said it was awesome, and went back for seconds. Today I made chili for dinner and I added more beans then meat. I also made some fresh bread. YUM! I wonder when he is going pick up on the fact that I am cutting his meat consumption.

I talked to my mother yesterday and she wanted to run something past me. She wants to bring gcc out here for Christmas. She even offered to take all of us to Disneyland on Christmas day. I have given this a lot of thought and I am going to call my mom back this weekend and ask her some very hard questions.

My mom thinks that bringing gcc out here that it will help her since this will be the first Christmas with her mother. Well, one of my questions is will gcc live by my rules. That means eating what is put in front of you and not waiting until everyone goes to bed to get ice cream. Or will my mom give into her and go buy her fast food, which will cause a fight between my mother and I. Lets face it, if my children have to eat what is put in front of them and then they see gcc getting whatever she wants, is that really fair to my children.

Another question is I am hoping that my mom is not expecting us to be a happy little family at the happiest place on earth. We are more like the night mare on Christmas. Amber, Nikki, and Chris are not going to want to hang around gcc and Ryan. Rusty and I are not sure that we even want to go. Rusty and I can't ride the rides so what the heck are we suppose to do? I guess we could try to walk around and look happy and see a bunch of crap that we don't need and can't afford.

My last question is if she is bringing gcc child out here to forget about her mother being dead, is that really a good idea since I am still alive and my children still have a mother?

I am just seeing WWIII beginning. I really don't want that, so I will have to talk my mom and just lay out the cold hard facts.

Today I am going to try to get some pet quilts done. I said that I wanted to do one a day, but so far that has not happened. So I am going to just sit down today and try to get some done.

I am also thinking that I might go to the lake and go for a swim. The lake should be empty, so it will be almost like I am on a private beach. I so need an ocean day. I am thinking that I will hit the ocean one day next week, since I am going to take the kittens back. To me there is nothing better then being being sun kissed and covered in sand.

Life is good.

not to much going on

There really has not been to much going on around here. I know the cycles of my life, and when not much is going on that means that soon my life is going to get crazy.

We started to get a flea problem. Now for most people this would be no big deal, but I have never had flea's, and I have a lot of pets! I called the shelter to see if they would give me some flea medicine for the babies, and not only did they do that, but they also gave me enough for all of my animals! That right there saved me a ton of money.

Since I gave everyone the flea crap last night, I got the carpets cleaned today. Last month I ordered a new carpet cleaner and it works so well! I think I have ocd when it comes to my carpets.

Chris got his first pay check today and he is so happy! Rusty was able to get Chris on where he works. It is hot and sticky, nasty warehouse work, but it is a job and that is all that matters. Chris is just so thrilled, and I am happy for him. It seems that everything is starting to come together for him.

Amber has two jobs interviews next week, and she can't wait. Amber is so ready to be employed, and I am just as ready. I am keeping my fingers crossed that one of these jobs will work out for her.

I talked to my mom last week and she is having trouble with GCC ( golden chosen child). I must say that I am very proud of my self for not going off. I just listened to my mom and I could think was, "well you created this child". Being a grandma and being a mom are so different, and my mom no longer get the privilege of being grandma anymore. I know it sounds mean, but my mom created this monster child and now she has to raise her. I have no sympathy.

Well, I better get my bum heading off to bed. I am so worn out today.

I am so proud

Here is another video. This one I am showing everyone some of my quilts. I just love it when people give me bags of scrap because I just let the creative juices flow. Hey Betty, a lot of these quilts were made from the bag of the material that you gave me. Some people said that they are having trouble viewing the videos, so you can go to me you tube channel. Go to youtube and type in noonmom.

I have been trying to get a pet quilt a day done. Now that I have some "down" time, I figured this would be a good time to really get the shelter stocked up. I am also trying to get ahead on my quilts for the shut ins.


Last year around Christmas time I found a tree that had seniors names and wishes on it. I was so shocked at the fact that a lot of these seniors were asking for necessities. So I did pull a few names off the tree, but I said that I wanted to make twelve lap blankets for the seniors. That is only one a month, and that would be doable. I would like to get them done early and have them delivered by December first. Actually I am going to put them in the drop box, so no one will know who made them.

Amber started her college classes yesterday and I must say that I very proud her. Amber originally signed up for a math class, but she signed up at the wrong campus. So yesterday when she discovered this she immediately went and found the same class at the right campus and she had the teacher add her. Amber also went over to the resource center and asked about getting a tutor, Yep they have free tutors there! Amber is not one to just go and ask for help. She will usually call me and ask me what she should do. I am so glad that Amber id taking some initiative and trying to figure things out for herself. That right there showes me that she is really starting to mature.

Nikki is liking being back in a public high school. I am glad. To me it really does not matter as long as she is learning and doing well. Nikki thrives off being around other people and being surrounded by friends.

Jake, one of the marines, left yesterday. He is now out of the marines, but I have a feeling that he will be back here before to much longer. Jake is a good kid and I just love being around his mom and step dad. They did such an awesome job with him.

The girls get state aid for their medical, and Amber got cut off earlier this year. I thought that was that, but it turns out that they can stay on state aid until the turn 21 as long as they live here. So I need to refill out some paper work, which they swear they sent me, and then I can get the girls back on aid. Now the reason they get state aid is because their sperm donor is not in the house. Here is the catch. The state is trying to say that the girls have insurance through their sperm donor and they even gave us a policy number. So now I have been trying to hunt down all this information. Why am I doing a social workers and the d.a. job? No one will really tell me anything, but if I was the d.a. they would tell me everything. Oh all of this makes my head hurt.

Anyway, life is good

you have to do better then that.

I am feeling a little better tonight. I had Amber take a video of my with some of the quilts. I can't figure out how Rusty got them to load, so I will have to work on that tomorrow.

Rusty, Chris and Jake are all off smoking cigars and telling stories. I so don't understand it. But a bunch of guys get together, burn meat, smoke a cigar and tell war stories. They say it is fun. I say "Well at least I don't have to cook dinner tonight."

One of the marines, Jake, is out of the marines and will be heading back to Or. tomorrow. I know he will be back, I am just not sure when. I am so going to miss him. I miss all of them, but I guess that is the cycle of life.

I called Ryans teacher today, that got me where. I will have to see if she calls me back tomorrow. I am hanging on by a thread with this child. I just don't know what to do any more. I am just so worn down. This momma sure could use a break.

Rusty and I are both sad that the Amber starts college tomorrow. To us that means our children are growing up and it also means that summer is ever. I refuse to think that we might be coming to the end of summer. I want to suck every last bit of sun out of the summer. I am such a summer person.

I am now dealing with my ex. Why? Why is he still screwing over my children. If I could find the rock that he is under I would crush the rock! Thats o.k. I will find my way past this because Rusty and I have always supported the girls and we will continue to do so.

I have been doing a lot of sewing. I am not sure why I am still spending a lot of time at the machine. All of the marines quilts are done. My shrink say's that sewing is a form of therapy. I just gave him the dear in the headlights look. He say's I sew when I am stressed because I am finding order in a world that has no order. Well I guess that does explain the last few weeks.

Well I do have a few things that I should be finishing up. Life is keeping me busy, but it is not the edge of the seat busy.

I am so ....

I am not sure what I am. Maybe I am a fool. Maybe I am stupid. Maybe I am hopeful. Maybe I am just a mom that is at the end of her rope.

I made the mistake of asking Ryan what he was "learning" in school. Ryan said that he was learning fractions. What? So I ask Ryan some basic math questions and he could not answer them, so how is he learning fractions? I asked if he had been given a calculator yet. The answer is the same as it has always been.... NO.

Why can't this teacher follow an IEP? I have called, bitched, complained to the principal, said nothing, and bitched some more. Nothing works. Now what? Do I file a formal complaint against the teacher? I am going to do that on Monday. I know it won't do any good.

I just don't have any fight left in me. After I file the complaint I am going let the chips fall where they may. I have been told for years that the teachers are the professionals and they know better then me. I guess I should let them do whatever they want. After all I am not the one with a big fancy degree. All I know is you can't add fractions if you can't add whole numbers.

I dread Ryan coming from school because I know that it is time for me to deal with whatever. Homework, teachers, you name it. I don't want to deal with any of it any more. I want to send all of his homework back wrong. After all they are professionals not me.

Am I the only mom of a handi cap child that just wants it all to go away and resents the child for reasons that he can't control? Am I a bad parent because I no longer feel like being a parent to a handi cap child. Is it wrong for me to want to just walk away?

I am just done. I am done fighting.

Its Friday!

I would like to say thanks to a dear friend in Chicago for giving me this award, now get your bum to California so we can go have coffee.

Where has this week gone?

Nikki came back from her mission's trip and she just fell in love with the people in Vegas. I get so much joy out of watching Nikki grow and when she learns things her face just lights up. I tell everyone that knows her to keep an eye on her because one of these days she is going to change the world.

Nikki and Ryan started school on Wednesday. Nikki is very happy to be back in regular high school, and as long as she is happy I am happy. Ryan is also loving life right now because he is back with his friends.

Next week Ryan will start to get homework, and that is when I have to put on my boxing gloves. I don't know why his teacher can't follow an IEP, but she can't. I am going to fight her all the way on this and I am even considering filing a complaint against her.

Amber starts college next week, and I am glad that she has decided to take some core classes. Amber is still looking for a job, but I am sure something will open up soon. This is Ambers last weekend before school starts so she went to the river with some friends. I guess it is one final good bye to summer.

You know that is sad. I feel like our summer is over now that the kids are back in school. I was thinking "man the children have not done anything this summer." I know I am wrong there. They have all been on some kind of trip, we have gone to the beach several times, all of the children have gone to concerts, bonfires, and the list goes on. At least I have reach a goal. I so wanted to spend more time with the children and I did just that.

So I got my hands on a camcorder and now that I have learned how to post videos I think I am going to go do more video blogging. I wanted to do a video blog today but no one is here to help me, so it will have to wait until next week.

My dear friend over at smaller footprint put up another challenge this week, and the challenge was to use or make your own cleaners. I wanted to make a video of all my cleaners and my kitchen, but it will have to wait. So, the easiest cleaner that I make is a multi purpose cleaner. I use 1 part vinegar and one part water. I just put it in a spray bottle and it works wonders! This is also good to keep in mind in case you run out of a cleaner you can make this up real quick.

Another cleaner that I make is my own dish washer soap. There are times when I run my dishwasher three or four times in one day, and buying that soap was getting very expensive. So here is how I make dishwasher soap:

1 1/2 cups of borax

1 1/2 cups of baking soda

1 cup salt

use 1/4 cup per load.

I make up two or three bathes at a time. I keep it in an old ice cream bucket. I have discovered that a scoop that you get from lemonade or Gatorade is about 1/4 cup, so I use that to measure out the soap. It works great.

Well I am done with all the marines quilts, so now I am working on making some little quilts. I am going to use them in gift baskets and to wrap around wine bottles. This is an opportunity to really show off my handi work. So I better go get a few things done around here, so I can get back to my sewing.

what I have been up to

My life

Over the last few weeks I have have an e mail conversation with a gal that takes me back to the dark days of my life. Days when I could not get out of bed and I thought that life just sucked. Then I was watching Oprah and she was talking about a gratitude journal, so I started one. Every night I would write three thing that I was grateful for. Years later I found that journal and as I flipped through it I found a day where all I could write was "the day is over". That seems like a life time ago.

On one of Rusty's deployments, I was feeling sad for myself. At that time I was friends with one of the Chaplin's on base. There in his office was a poster of a flower growing up. The flower was surrounded my cement and the caption said "bloom where you are planted." It was suggested to me that I read some books by John Maxwell. So I did, and so started my growth into a new person.

Yesterday, on facebook, I said that I was going to the beach to fly kites. A dear friend gave me the highest compliment and called me a hippy and said she was jealous. I take that as the highest compliment ever.

Yes, I am a hippy, and yes I love life. I often think back to that poster. "bloom where you are planted" O.K. so we are broke, but we do live in California, and the beach is free, so why not go play in the ocean, fly kites and just enjoy it.

But, my challenge to everyone in this world including my own children, is to live life to the fullest. Try new and exciting things. Go sit on the grass and listen to a jazz concert, pick up a local paper and see what is going on in your own community, and get involved. I have learned that life is about living and not waiting.

My life is also full of contrast. There are times when I do just pack up the children and go. Then there are times when I am just itching to get out of the house. There are times that I do go rock climbing and scare myself, then there are days when I sit and create works of art, by sewing a quilt.

My life is so not perfect and I do not hide that fact. We do have savings but not that much. Our bills are paid, and we have food, but we really have to save for the extras. That's o.k. being poor does not mean that we have to sit in the house and feel sorry for ourselves. It means that we just find cheap thing to do.

My children are learning this lesson as well. I am so glad that I raised them they way did.... broke. My children appreciate everything, and they know they have to work for what they want. I often take my children on my get up and go moments and they are just shocked at some of the places we end up. Chris is really starting to get this. He is now jumping in and joining us and he is longer saying oh poor me. To me that showes that Chris is growing and that he is learning while you may need money to get by, it does not make you happy. Happiness is found in the little moments of life.

I finally talked to Nikki yesterday and she had a great trip! Nikki did struggle with Vegas for a few day's but then she found her groove and is loving it. I have not heard all the details of her trip, but I know that she wants to go back to Vegas several more times this year.

My friend, Tim, is just so amazed at Nikki and he said that I did a great job raising her. Well thank you Tim. Tim said she is a whirl wind and that he is having a hard time keeping up with her. Tim also said that he had fun with her, since he has no children this has been an eye opener for him.

This was also sent in motion long before we ever knew it. It was just back in February that I got back in touch with Tim. Tim lives in Vegas and Nikki ended up in Vegas. Tim's house is only five blocks from the church where Nikki was working.

Today I am going to rally the troops. They have a house to clean. The boys want to go fly kites again, and One of my girlfriends and her little girl are going with us. I know that I wont always life near the ocean, so I am going to take every opportunity to go play on it while I can.

Life is good

eco friendly friday

Here it is another Friday, and another chance to suggest some small ways that we can all help. Reduce footprints ( on my side bar) suggest we all vegan one day a week.

Now for me this is not that hard, but for my husband it is. He loves his meat and he refuses to give it up. That is fine if you are like him, so let me suggest a few other things.

Since I am now having to cook more so that I can have left overs for Rusty and Chris's lunch I have had to get creative. Meat is expensive and I don't feel that they need more meat, so this week I have been just adding more vegi's to whatever I cook.

Last night I made chicken stew. I added an extra can of green bean's instead of adding extra meat. I have started packing Rusty more fruit. Rusty was complaining that he was getting hungry late in the afternoon. So I got grapes and apples and they now go in his lunch so he can snake while he drives.

By adding more fruit and vegi's I am able to stretch our food bill, eat less meat and I am able to get some more good whole foods into my family.

So if you are like me, and you have a strict meat other try cutting them back without them knowing it! I can go vegan and not miss the meat at all.

So what have I done this week to green up my home?

1. All that used plastic ware was sent into work with Chris and Rusty. I saved it from the landfill for a little while.

2. I freecycled a ton of stuff this week. At least that stuff will also be reused before it hits the land fills.

3. Rusty got Chris a job with him, so that they could car pool. We were wondering how we were going to work out the car issue once Chris got a job, now we don't have to wonder any more.

4. I am using old sheets as material for the quilt that I am working on.

5. A girlfriend asked me how to make laundry soap and a few other things, so she will now be making all of her own stuff!

We can change the world one person at a time.

Tell me, what you have done this week?

hanging out

This is a picture of me hanging out with some of my boys. Life is funny. I never wanted boys and now I have a house full of them, well for a while anyway.

I am done with all of the boys quilts, so that must mean one thing, they are all getting ready to leave. We have no set dates yet, but soon. It still sucks no matter how many times I do this.

I talked to Nikki on Monday. She is really struggling with this trip, so I called her other parents and talked to them for a bit. They said that they also talked to Nikki and got the impression that she was struggling. This trip is very different for Nikki. Yes it is here in the states, but there something like 500 people on this trip! Nikki does not have the security of her friends this year. I know that Nikki will be fine. This trip is really pushing her to get out of her box, and that is scary for all of us. One thing I do know for sure is that this trip will change her, as all of her trips do. I can't wait to hear all about this trip.

I also found out that Nikki had called Chris. I asked Chris to not take any of her calls, and I asked Nikkis other parents to please get in touch with someone out there and make sure that the cell phones are off. I don't mind Nikki calling Chris, but I feel he is the wrong person to call when you need support. Chris was never allowed to do anything without his parents watching him. So he has no idea what it is like to be in strange city and to be on a missions trip. This is nothing against Chris, it is what it is.

Speaking of Chris, he is doing great and he thrilled to have a job! That's right Rusty got him a job working with him. It is only part time, but hey it is a job and it pays $10 an hour, and he will be able to ride with Rusty to and from work. Chris said "the first thing I am going to save for is a camera. I want one like yours." For the record, I have a canon rebel. Expensive, yes, but it was given to us. Then he said "After boot camp I am going to go set up a phone and buy a lap top." I reminded him to make sure that he puts money aside so he can come home for the holidays. Right now life is good for Chris, and I can't wait for him to get a little taste of success.

Amber is still looking for a job. Rusty has talked to a few different people just trying to get her on someplace, and she is applying for jobs down on the base. Amber was a little bit angry that Rusty did not give her the job, but I explained to Amber that she really does not want to work there. It is hot back breaking work. I keep saying it and I will say it again, something will turn up. Right now Amber just wants a job and a few benefits.

I have been keeping my eyes and ears open for a job for myself as well. I am not looking for anything great. I would like to make $100 a week. Just something to give me some spending and saving money. More saving, since the coast of college keeps going up. We will see. I hope Amber gets a job before I do.

Next weekend there is this motor cross thing going on down at base, and Chris and Amber want to go. So I called my girlfriend, and she is going to bring the triplets up. I have a feeling we are going to be having a lot of people going, so one of the kids said well we can go to the beach after we are done there. True, we could, so I talked to my girlfriend and we are thinking pizza on the beach. That would be a cool dinner. It should be a good time.

I have been trying to drop a few pounds. I would love to drop 20 pounds by November, so that I can put on a little something to wear to the ball. I have either been walking every night or swimming. Either way I have increase my exercise level, and I have cut my calories, so we will see. If I don't drop the weight, that is fine as long as I look more toned. Note to self: start looking for the dress now. we all know what a cheap ass you are and we all know you won't buy anything new.

Since I am trying to drop a few pounds I decided that Rusty should too. Rusty really does not need to. He 6'2" and is 190 pounds. Not bad, but I have been adding more fruit and vegi's to his lunch. I have to find someway to stretch the left overs.

I would like to know how some people do it. I have four teens in the house and next to our house food is our biggest bill. Amber said "well look on the bright side you wont have to feed Chris, Nikki and Ryan lunch anymore." I had to correct her. Yes I will be feeding Chris lunch because even when he works, he still has to eat. So I will have to make more dinner and hope I can stretch it into two lunch's. Nikki and Ryan can eat at school, but if NIkki goes back to playing sports they food bill will take another hit. I just thank God for good deals on food.

My babies don't think they are babies anymore. They can now eat big kitty food as long as it is wetted down. they use the big kitty box, and they have learned to scale our bed so they can sleep in it. The little one with the eye problems is doing very well, and I just know she will be fine when she goes to her new home. So now they are just hanging out and growing.

Today I am going to try to get up to Nikki's room which is totally trashed and go through her stuff. I am such a bad mom. If I am forced to clean a room I will clean it with trash bags. So I am going to do some of that today. I know that she has stuff she does not wear, and stuff she has not seen in a very long time, so it is time for all of that stuff to find a new home, and will be every so happy to help it along.

I think I am going to go do some sewing. Everyone is still sleeping. I think I am the only person that is up at this horrible time of the morning. But on the bright side I can at least get some sewing done and not have to listen to everyone bitch about everything.

Life is good

there was a fork in the road......

My father use to use that quote all the time. "there was a fork in the road and I chose the one less traveled."

Some of the events that are unfolding in my life are because of the choices I have made, and some are not.

Right now I feel like I am being forced to take the road less traveled. I am trying to get all the children set for school, and let me tell you Amber and Nikki are going to break my bank.

I can't believe how expensive college is, and Amber is only going to a junior college. Now I chose to make Amber go to college. I chose to make her take a minimum of two classes a semester. In exchange I would let her live her for free. I never chose to be caught in the middle. According to the state we make to much money to qualify for any grants. Since when is poverty to much? So I am shouldering the burden. Notice I said I. I have been saving money like a mad women. I have a separate bank account where I place all the extra money that I make. This is what is paying for college.

My mom offered to help pay for Ambers books. I have chosen to not allow her to pay for shit. The last thing I need is blood money. Yes, that is my choice.

I have been looking around for a very part time job, just something a few hours a day, and no weekends. I have checked with the school district, the water company..... no luck. I can't go back to work full time because of Ryan. Every time I do get a full time job I get fired because I have to leave because Ryan is sick, or because no one is around to watch him. Not working is kinds being forced on me, but I need to do something.

I chose to let Nikki make some very hard decisions in her life. I am now paying the price for that. Now that she back in a regular school, I am paying for yearbooks and asb cards and....... I am about sucked dry.

It was my choice to not go and get a new court order, and have my ex pay for half of Amber and Nikki's stuff. I figure that we should just let sleeping dogs lie. That is my choice and now I am starting to question it. Not that he would ever pay it, but at least with the court order it would be tacked onto his bill.

Rusty and I chose to do everything on our own. We did this because we wanted our children to know who really loved them and supported them. It was Rusty and I, not their sperm donor.

I am done being down. I just one of Ambers books for free! That is a huge savings. I am actually getting some sewing done on my own quilt. I have plenty of food. I have money in savings to pay for all of this. I have a husband who loves me and who bust his ass everyday just so I can be a stay at home mom. My children are not pregnant or on drugs.

Life is good

the last two

Well here they are. These are the last two quilts that I needed to get done before the boy's leave.

These two walked around with their quilts like they were two years old, and I smiled.

The one thing I hear a lot is that they have never received such a nice gift. Well now the have.

Last night I took some scrap material and made the cutest little blanket. I think I am going to make more of them and wrap wine bottles in them and hand them out as Christmas gifts. I also have material on the table for a quilt for me! I have had two of the cut, but I have never had time to work on them, so maybe before the year is over I get both of them done.

Today is Nikki's first working day in Vegas. I was told that this was a rough trip, but I know my Nikki can handle it. Nikki went to Vegas a few day's early and she will be spending a few extra days there. I guy I have known all my life is showing her a good time. I am glad, because it is like a mini vacation for her.

Amber is back and is about to suck the life out of me. Amber said "I am not going to be able to pay my phone bill or my insurance this month." I told her that she has three months worth of bills in her savings account and that she needed to use that money. Amber went and applied at hooters for a job.

I took some of the boys down to Point Loma and we went rock climbing. It was fun, and I was happy to just get out of the house for a while. I have to admit that we saw a one legged man out there rock climbing and he was kicking our ass! The tide was really high so we all got soaked, so it must have been a good day.

I spoke with my mom yesterday and she really liked her Christmas gift, so I am so happy about that. I just had no idea what to get her, so I guess adopting a bear was a good move on my part.

I sent one of the kittens back to the shelter yesterday. He was big enough to go get fixed and find a new home. I still have three babies, and they are just growing like weeds! Now is the fun stage, because they are all weened and potty trained, and they are just now really learning how to play.

Last week I ordered a new carpet cleaner from overstock.com and it should be here today! I can't wait. My carpets look so bad, and I don't like that. So I will be spending the afternoon cleaning my carpets.

Well my day is calling me, so I better get to it.