you have to do better then that.

I am feeling a little better tonight. I had Amber take a video of my with some of the quilts. I can't figure out how Rusty got them to load, so I will have to work on that tomorrow.

Rusty, Chris and Jake are all off smoking cigars and telling stories. I so don't understand it. But a bunch of guys get together, burn meat, smoke a cigar and tell war stories. They say it is fun. I say "Well at least I don't have to cook dinner tonight."

One of the marines, Jake, is out of the marines and will be heading back to Or. tomorrow. I know he will be back, I am just not sure when. I am so going to miss him. I miss all of them, but I guess that is the cycle of life.

I called Ryans teacher today, that got me where. I will have to see if she calls me back tomorrow. I am hanging on by a thread with this child. I just don't know what to do any more. I am just so worn down. This momma sure could use a break.

Rusty and I are both sad that the Amber starts college tomorrow. To us that means our children are growing up and it also means that summer is ever. I refuse to think that we might be coming to the end of summer. I want to suck every last bit of sun out of the summer. I am such a summer person.

I am now dealing with my ex. Why? Why is he still screwing over my children. If I could find the rock that he is under I would crush the rock! Thats o.k. I will find my way past this because Rusty and I have always supported the girls and we will continue to do so.

I have been doing a lot of sewing. I am not sure why I am still spending a lot of time at the machine. All of the marines quilts are done. My shrink say's that sewing is a form of therapy. I just gave him the dear in the headlights look. He say's I sew when I am stressed because I am finding order in a world that has no order. Well I guess that does explain the last few weeks.

Well I do have a few things that I should be finishing up. Life is keeping me busy, but it is not the edge of the seat busy.