Friday, January 30, 2009

eco friendly Friday...death

Rusty and I have long debated about who will die first. I told Rusty that when he dies I am going to take him to a taxidermy and then have placed on something that I could wheel around the house. Then when I get sick of him I can just place him in the closet.
Rusty say's that will never happen because he thinks I am going to die first. He will not donate any of my organs and he wants to carry my ashes around.
The first funeral I remember going to was my grandmother. There she was all laid out in a casket. There were flowers everywhere and back then we even went to the place where they were going to lay her to rest.
There was grandmother in this steel casket that could be sealed. Now who is going to dig up my grandmother and see if her body is perfectly preserved? Why are the holes so deep? Why are caskets steel? Does someone really care is their casket will last forever?
When my father in law died, my mother in law had the body cremated, and she even bought a sea salt urn! I must say that this urn was cool looking. We always said that we were going to go dump dad in the ocean. We thought this would be fitting since he loved to scuba dive. Instead dad ended up sitting in our closet for almost two years.
Then my mother in law died. She had no life insurance, so Rusty and I had her cremated and we did not buy her an urn. Now if you have never picked up someones remains let me tell you how they come. They come in a very fancy zip lock bag and that bag is placed in another bag that is just a little nicer then a crown royal bag.
I ended up driving my mother in law around for a month. I don't know why I did not put her in the closet with dad, but I didn't. We did lay both of to rest at Riverside National cemetery. When I made the arrangements I asked for one plot and one head stone. I figured they lived together all of their lives so why not lay them to rest together.
I am sure by now that dad's urn has dissolved and that he has now become part of the earth again.
When my dad died my mom had his body cremated. We all have little urns that we can wear as necklaces. Yep. I can wear my dad as a piece of jewelry if I wanted to. My mom still has my dad's ashes. I have no idea what she is going to do with them.
Then my sister died. My mom actually rented a casket. Yep, you can now rent a casket before you have someone cremated. My sister's ashes are sitting on her fireplace mantel.
While I was back in Chicago I learned that my mother had her mothers ashes in the ceder chest. Great! So let me guess. I will inherit dad and grandma?
I told Rusty that when I die I want him to steal my body from the morgue, shove me into a torpedo tube, steel the ship, take me out to sea and shoot me out of the cannon. I will be fish food! Rusty asked me if I knew how many laws I was asking him to break.
O.K., so Rusty won't do that for me. So I started researching eco friendly funerals. I don't want to be put in a steal coffin. I want to go back to the earth and I want to give back.
There are actually cemeteries where you don't get a headstone, and you have to be buried in a biodegradable coffin or urn. I like that idea!
The picture at the top of the page is a picture of the urn that I want. With in five minutes of getting wet the urn dissolves.
So, even in death I am going to be eco friendly. Here is what I told Rusty that I want.
1. I want my hair shaved off. People tell me all the time that they love my hair, so I want someone to have it.
2. I want my skin donated to a burn patient.
3. My eyes may be bad, but they would work for a blind person.
4. Then I want to be cremated and placed in biodegradable urn.
5. I want to be lay to rest down at Fort Rosecrans National cemetery. This cemetery is so nice and you can either look out over the San Diego bay or the pacific ocean. I don't want a head stone. A simple wooden cross will work.
Rusty said that he is going to cremate me and leave me in the zip lock bag which will go in a crown royal bag, then he will place the in a big plastic container, and place that in a plastic grocery sack.
I must out live this man!


natalie said...

what a beautiful view on death and
on staying a part of people's lives!
Perhaps you might consider writinga book Kelli

Gerry said...

I must confess I got a kick out of this discussion, as in our old age I find that what to do at the end occupies a lot of minds. And some funny reactions result. I am glad that other people keep the ashes around as I wondered if I was the only one who could not bring themselves to scatter the sshes. We did have an ashes scattering trip up Lake Powell with my sister, but her daughters and family wanted a marker in Boulder, our home town as well. I have instructed my family to put no reminder of me anywhere in Boulder. As I do not feel welcome there alive anymore so would be sure to be an intrusion in death! I did not know coffins could be rented so that was some new info for me. When we had my sister's viewing the ashes had failed to come so we did honor to her photo. I can see why you have not worn an ashes necklace though. Gerry

My Outside Voice said...

I am so ashamed.. I laughed about half way through this blog.. I'm sorry.. but the idea of driving around with your MIL's ashes killed me... I laughed so hard I had to get up and walk away for a minute...

I want to be cremated and I want the Princess to put me in a clear mason jar and set me on her desk.. so I can read blogs long after I'm dead..

Think she will?

Have a great weekend..

LIZ said...

I must say I have never thought about my death in so much detail or made any definite plans about what I want done with my remains.

Paula said...

Oh Kelli this is a good down to earth (no pun intended) entry.

a corgi said...

okay I laughed through this (I'm sorry if it was disrespectful)

I'm so "just cremate me and I don't care what you do with the ashes" kind of person; I'm not going to be there anyway, I'm going to be in heaven with Jesus. I don't even want a memorial service or funeral; I do want my organs donated if they will help someone

I honestly hope I die first before my hubby; I just want to see Jesus first :) (and be there to greet hubby when he arrives)

you are too funny but I know this is a serious matter

enjoy the weekend


moshell's lilbit of space said...

we have this conversation at my house all the time. My FIL was cremated and we kept him at the foot of the bed in the hope chest. When my MIL passed (she did not want any part of cremation) we put Daddy under Linda's pillow and they went to the family cemetary.

I did drive around with him for a while too...people thought I was crazy. I just thought he'd enjoy it. :)

Heli gunner Tom said...

Hi Kelli,
Per your fine comment on my last post .... YOU are a shinning example to other ladies and parents, and IMHO, more people ought to read your Blog posts.
God Bless you and your family!
Thank you for your many kindnesses.

Bro. Tom

Traci said...

I think this is great! I used to really get nuts over the waste that is a cemetary BUT I disagree with that now. I don't want a big fancy coffin, a pine box will do just fine. I think it is important for descendants to have a place to come to when they need to grieve.

My friend did bring me her uncles ashes to look at one day and guess what?! it was in a Crown Royal bag. Said so on the side!

Missy said...

I don't even want to think about it. I'll get myself a policy and let my family do whatever they desire.

My sister had a regular burial this Monday. Her service was beautiful.


About Me

My photo
lake elsinore, ca
I am a stay at home mom. I am also married to a veteran and he is the love of my life. I keep it real here and I hold nothing back. My life is a roller coaster ride, so strap on your seatbelt.... here we go!