I actually took the time to do my hair today. Now I am wondering why. We are in such a marriage rut. Now the last time I said I was in a marriage rut I was gluing tea cup to saucers and wearing my dead dad ties.
I am married I should see my husband more then a few hours a day. I should be having sex all the time! I want hot nasty pig sex. I want to wake up the next morning and wonder how we chocolate on the ceiling! And yes that has really happened.
It is St. Patty's day. I am so missing my dad. My dad use to play Irish music for us. Does anyone remember the unicorn song? I love that song.
I think my whole life is in rut. I want to laugh until I cry. I want to push my limits. I want to do something that will scare me. I want to run away to the ocean and look for sand dollars. Instead I am sitting here blogging.
Rusty has promised me that he will put a new radiator in my car this weekend. Then I will more freedom to go do stuff. I was not meant to live a life routine. I was born to be the one who pushes the limits.
I have not fired my .22. I am thinking I will head down to base and go shooting. I will have to wait until this weekend and make sure that all of the boy's go with me. I want to remind them that I am still a good shot.
Three of the marines are on their way out. The one that just got home wants to do a rapid redeployment. What is up with these boys? I know that war is what boys do and old men talk about. I know that It is their job. I am just so sick of this damn war. Every time the boys leave we roll the dice and they come home. I fear that my luck will run out. I fear that their future wives will lay in bed and wonder if this damn ptsd will ever get better. I hate the marine corps and I hate this damn war.
However I know without these brave young men I would not have any of the freedoms that I have today. I would love to have all boys here at one time. I want to walk up to them one by one and give them a kiss.
Even if I am having a pity party for one. I still have a great life and I know that.
Life is good.